After a quick informal poll with some of my male and female friends, I decided to make a list of some of the things that turn us off on a first date. Actually, normal yet annoying things that seem to happen over and over again. Not crazy first dates who pee in an alley right in front of you. That kind of story is a whole different level of bad. These are the everyday annoyances that sneak up on you. And somehow they can ruin the whole mood faster than anything dramatic.

Someone who talks too much can leave you unable to get a word in, even after trying to interrupt. Someone who has nothing to say is just as awkward, because a first date needs some real conversation. I want to hear about something beyond work, even if it is just surfing, traveling, baseball, or fly fishing. A little balance goes a long way. If one person does all the talking, the date starts to feel like a lecture. If nobody talks, it feels like a dental appointment.

Angry people make dating exhausting, because everything seems ruined before it even starts. Chronic postponer types are frustrating too, especially when a simple coffee date keeps getting rescheduled. You do not need a grand plan for a first date, just enough interest to actually show up. If it keeps dragging on, the spark is already gone. The whole thing starts to feel like a chore instead of a chance. At that point, it is hard to imagine a second date making things better.

Some people dive straight into politics, health issues, family drama, or past relationships, which is way too much for a first date. Bragging about careers, money, and success can be just as off-putting. I really do not care what kind of car you drive. Well, maybe unless it is a squeaky 1995 Saturn. There are plenty more turnoffs, but that is a good start. A first date should feel light enough to breathe. If it sounds like a confession booth or a sales pitch, something has gone wrong.